Adventures In Radio #3 – New year’s Eve

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Adventures in Radio #3 – New Year’s Eve

“That’ll do it for today. I’d like to thank Michelle Branch for coming in and letting

me fawn over her. The woman is beautiful as well as talented. Her CD is over a year old and

I still can’t get
it out of my CD player. I’d also like to thank Kiefer Sutherland from the

best show on TV, 24, for calling and sitting through the praise I heaped on him and the show.

Tonight is our big New Year’s Eve concert, come on down and check it out. I’ll be down there,

hopefully wandering around, drunkenly singing Pink’s Let’s Get This Party Started. They may

make me stay sober though, so I can do interviews. If you hear me slurring my words while

talking to Avril, you know it’s because they didn’t keep me away from the liquor enough. I

leave you with today’s final request. Erin wants to hear the new Madonna song, so here’s Die

Another Day,” I said before turning my microphone off.

“You know you’ll wind up having to work tonight. They always ask you, and you always say

yes. There’s no point in even thinking otherwise,” Matt said when we were walking out of the


“I know, I know. Whenever we do a special event, I get suckered into being the one that

interviews everyone. It’s cool when you get to talk to someone you like, but it sucks when

you have to interview assholes or completely uninteresting people. That’s the price I pay to

be in this line of work I guess. I just hope that none of them are the temperamental type

who’ll throw a fit if I ask something even remotely personal.”

“Quit complaining. If you get to bang Elisha Cuthbert, then you lose all right to complain

about anything ever again. We commoners would give up vital organs to do that, and you got it

served up on a silver platter. I’d hate you if you weren’t such a nice guy,” Matt sneered.

Shrugging, I said “I’ll buy you a beer tonight and you’ll forget about everything for a

while. Besides, aren’t you the one with the girlfriend who’s a dead ringer for Tara Reid?”

“She has some resemblance, but she’s not Elisha Cuthbert. I just want to know how you do

it, and I still haven’t gotten you to answer the rumor about you and Alyssa Milano several

months ago. That’s not even counting the other rumors, or the ones that the rumor mill didn’t

find out about.”

“Alyssa’s way out of my league. I don’t even know how that rumor got started,” I said with

a shrug.

“Elisha’s out of your league too, but that didn’t seem to stop you. Saying someone’s out of

your league isn’t a denial, it’s merely dodging the question. At least tell me if you fucked

Christina Aguilera when she was in a few months ago. I don’t think I could handle it if you did,”

Matt said, getting fired up.

“That one’s a no. She comes across as too much of a controlling bitch for me to entertain

the thought. She seems like the kind of woman who’ll steal your wallet and knife you in your sleep

after you’re done. I like trashy women, but she’s not trashy in that good, fun, spanky way.”

“You’re telling me that you wouldn’t fuck Christina? If she begged you, you still wouldn’t?”

Matt asked.

“Are you kidding me? I’m a man, of course I would. If she made the first move, I wouldn’t be

able to say no. She’s just not the type of woman I could bring myself to pursue. I’m as much of a

slave to my pants as you are my friend, I just prefer women with less piercings and tattoos than

I have,” I said.

“You don’t have any piercings, and only two tattoos that I know of. It doesn’t take much to

top that, and most of the women that can top it aren’t trashy.”

“I have three tattoos, thank you very much. I’ve got the devil slow dancing with an angel on

the side of one arm, a predator on my shoulder, and then I’ve got ‘IT’ dripping blood on the back

of my right leg. In Stephen King’s It, Stan Uris gets the call from Mike, goes to take a bath,

slits his wrists, and writes ‘IT’ in blood on the wall of the bathroom. The devil and angel dancing

shows that good and evil aren’t as far apart as everyone seems to think, and the predator is there

because it was just a kick ass movie,” I explained.

“I’m surprised they hired you with all those tattoos. There are a couple people here with hearts

or names, but you’ve got the fucking devil and a word that’s dripping blood,” Matt pointed out.

“I had them covered up when I came in for the interview, and they never asked if I had any

tattoos. If they have a problem with them, then they just have to ask me to cover them up and I will.

Kenny’s even told me that it doesn’t make a difference to him, and the higher ups don’t care as long

as the ratings are good. My sister is as clean cut as they come, and even she has Tweety Bird on her

ankle. They’re no longer for bikers and sailors only. Everyone’s getting them, even Britney has one.”

“I don’t know if I could bring myself to get one. I’m not big on pain, so going out of my way to

inflict is on myself doesn’t seem like something I’d want to do.”

Patting him on the back, I said “I tell you what. I’m going to be getting another one soon

probably, so how about we go in and get one at the same time? I was thinking of getting a sword on my

back, and you could get a coiled up snake or something.”

“I do like snakes, and my pet snake might even like seeing another snake on me. I guess it

wouldn’t be so bad if I had someone there to make sure I didn’t pussy out.”

“That’s the spirit. My New Year’s resolution is to get you into the chair at a tattoo parlor. I

don’t care if you get a tiny heart or the Mona Lisa on your back, just as long as you get one.” Looking

at my watch, I asked “well, see you tonight?”

“Yeah, I’ll show up some time tonight. Gotta get backstage and meet Pink. I knew I took this job

for a reason, and it sure wasn’t the money.”

Laughing, I said “yeah, the money isn’t exactly flowing in. When you meet Pink, ask her what kind

of tattoo you should get. She likes guys with tattoos, so that might be your in.”

“If it gets me laid, I’ll being the one buying the drinks tonight,” he said as he headed off to

his car.

“I’m not guaranteeing that it’ll get you laid, but it might get the ball rolling enough for you to

possibly get laid,” I yelled after him as I got into my car.

“Ah, here he is,” Kenny said when I showed up at the concert. “We’ve been waiting for you. Michelle

goes on in an hour, and I was hoping that you’d be willing to interview her before she goes on. I know

you already interviewed her this afternoon, but we’d like to have a couple minutes with each act. The

whole ‘this is what I do before a show’ interview type of thing. Nothing big, maybe five or ten minutes

that we can play for the folks at home. Craig’s busy broadcasting and you’re the best interviewer, so I

was hoping you’d be willing to do it.”

“Since you went to the trouble of stroking my ego, I guess I’m obligated to do it. Where’s

Michelle? Just give me a microphone and point me in the right direction,” I said, grabbing the

microphone from Kenny’s hand.

“She should be in her dressing room. If she’s not there, then ask her manager. If you can’t track

her down, then grab her as she coming off the stage. It really doesn’t matter when the interview is done,

it just seems to work better if they’re all done before they hit the stage.”

“I’m not sure what you just said, but I’m off anyway. Save a couple drinks for me. If I come back

here and there’s no alcohol, someone gonna hear about it,” I said as I set to find Michelle’s dressing


Finding it, I knocked on the door. Hearing a grunt from inside, I opened the door and said “I’m here

to do an interview with you before you take the…” I trailed off when the scene before me fully unveiled.

Sitting on the couch without any pants was Michelle, with her hand in her panties busy working herself

over.” Oh shit, I’m sorry. I thought you said to come in,” I stammered as I backed out the door. “I’ll

come back later.”

Closing the door, I leaned against the opposite wall in shock at catching Michelle Branch

masturbating. The scene of her hand inside her panties moving up and down, as she bit her bottom lip to

stifle the moans kept replaying in my head. I was on the third replay when the dressing room door opened

and a fully clothed Michelle popped her head out.

“It’s not what it looked like,” were the first words out of her mouth. When I opened my mouth to

reply, she continued “OK, maybe it was what you think. Can we talk about it in here rather than out in the


Nodding dumbly, I followed her back into her dressing room. When I was finally able to speak, I said

“I’m sorry for barging in like that. I knocked and thought I heard you tell me to come in. I didn’t mean

to see anything, but the image is burned into my brain.”

“It’s my fault, I should’ve locked the door. I knew someone was going to be dropping by, I just

couldn’t help myself. I get so tense before a show that that’s the only way to relieve the tension. Please

don’t tell anyone, it would be embarrassing if it got out,” she pleaded with me.

“No one would care if they found out you masturbated. Everyone does it.”

“I know everyone does it, but I don’t want everyone knowing that I do it. I really need to release

some of this tension, so if you promise not to tell anyone, then I’ll let you help me release it. How does

that sound?” She asked, giving me the puppy dog eyes.

“First off, I can’t resist puppy dog eyes. Second, I can’t pass up an offer like that. Third, I wouldn’t

have told anyone anyway.”

“Then come over here and get to work,” she told me as she started to squirm out of her black leather


“Yes ma’am,” I said as I gave her a hand with her pants. When her pants were all the way off. I dropped

to my knees and hooked my fingers in the waistband of her pink thonged panties. Pulling them down, I inhaled

deeply of the musky smell of her sex. As she stepped out of her undies, I ran my hand up the inside of her

leg until I was cupping her pussy. Running an index finger up and down her slit, I let it slip into her hole

before pulling out. Lifting one of her legs, I bent it at the knee and put it over my shoulder to give me

better access to her snatch. Snaking my tongue out, I lashed out at her clit. She moaned and grabbed the back

of my head as I pulled her clit into my mouth to suck on it.

“Uhh… yeah,” she moaned, closing her eyes and biting her lower lip.

Cupping an ass cheek in each hand, I pulled her cunt in even tighter and ran my tongue from the bottom

of her slit to the top and back again. Working her clit with my tongue, I slipped the middle finger of my right

hand into her pussy. Hearing her moan, I pulled the finger out and added a second. Working my fingers around,

I hit that special spot inside that sent her straight into orbit.

“OH GAWD,” she screamed as her whole body tensed. When she came back down, she fell back on the couch

with her legs splayed open obscenely.

My cock had been hard as a rock since I had walked into the room and found her polishing the pearl. Taking

the opportunity that the break in the action afforded me, I kicked off my shoes and started to pull down my


Opening her eyes, she saw the bulge in my underwear and gave me a blissful smile that only a woman in

post orgasmic lust can pull off. “I get more?” She asked me gleefully. Without even waiting for a response,

she sat up and yanked down my boxers. When my 8 inch cock popped out and almost hit her in the eye, she gasped

and pulled her head back. When I had stepped out of my pants and boxers, she leaned back forward and took my

manhood in her hand. Gently pumping the shaft, she closely examined the veiny surface. “Being on the road, I

don’t get a lot of time to stop and experience the finer things in life. A good cock is definitely one the

things that I miss the most when I’m on tour. A good lay is hard to find, and a good carpet munching is even

harder to come by. Good thing you’re here right now, so I can screw you silly. It’s time for you to show me

that I made the right decision by letting you in here.”

With that, she got up and pushed me down to sit on the couch where she had just been sitting. Without

warning, she lowered her head and gobble up my knob. An involuntary groan escaped my throat as her mouth made

it’s way down my shaft.

“I’m not going to last very long,” I warned her as she swirled her tongue around the head of my cock.

Putting my hands on the back of her head, I grabbed a handful of hair with each hand and pushed her mouth a

little further down my shaft. The thought of basting Michelle Branch’s golden tonsils with my man goo,

combined with the fact that I hadn’t gotten laid in a couple weeks conspired to shorten the blow job to mere

seconds. “I’m gonna cum,” I told her as she stepped up the suction she was applying to my dick. I thought

about pulling out and shooting my wad on her cheeks, but she was still wearing the black tank top that she

was going to wear out on stage. Instead, she pulled her mouth back until she was sucking on just the head and

pumping the shaft with her hand. That finally pushed me over the edge, and I unloaded what felt like a gallon

of jizz into her mouth. As she released my cock, she raised her head and I could see a little cum had escaped

and dribbled out of the corner of her mouth. The dribbles were quickly taken care of as she wiped her mouth

off with her index finger, and then licked off her finger by her tongue.

“I hope that wasn’t all you got,” she said with a smirk.

“I’m sure I can find one more for you. How you show me those tits while we wait?” I suggested.

“Naughty boy, wanting to see naked boobs. You sure you can handle it?” She asked as she started to raise

her tank top up.

When she had her top off, I reached out and grabbed her hand to pull her close. She leaned down to kiss

me while I reached behind her to unhook her bra. Breaking the kiss, she tossed her bra off to the side and

moved to position herself over my newly hard cock. As she sank her pussy down onto my staff, I reached behind

her and grabbed her ass with both hands. Holding onto her ass, I drilled her cunt from below. Wetting a finger

in the pussy juice running down my dick, I moved it up and started to rim her back door. Not hearing any cries

of resistance from her, I gently pushed my index finger against her anus. She let out an audible gasp when the

tip of my finger slipped past her sphincter and into her asshole. I couldn’t tell if she liked it or not at

first, but as she got used to it, she started thrusting her ass back at my finger before driving herself back

down on my cock.

Her moans grew louder as the tempo of her thrusts increased. “Oh, feels good, so good, need more, gonna

cum, need to cum,” she said between moans. Her body suddenly tensed before falling limp across my chest as

she orgasmed.

Wrapping my arms around her, I pulled her off my cock and laid her down on the couch so she could rest

before hitting the stage.

“Where you going?” She asked as I started to get dressed.

“I thought I’d let you recover so you could play tonight. If you want, I’ll come by later and we can have

another go then. Right now you need to regain some strength for the stage,” I told her. “I don’t want to have

to tell the bosses that you couldn’t perform because I drained all your energy.”

“OK, you better come back later. I haven’t finished with you, and I’m betting that you haven’t finished

with me either,” she said, eyes glued to the bulge in my pants.

“I tell you what, play Here With Me tonight and I’ll come back and fuck you senseless. Sound fair?”

Nodding, she said “that’ll be the first song we play then.”

Leaning down, I kissed her on the forehead before grabbing my gear and quietly leaving.

“That was quite a show you put on in there,” a voice said from behind me when I was in the hall.

Quickly turning around, I saw that it was Avril who had spoken. “You saw?” I asked her.

“No, I was walking by and heard her moaning. Either you’re good or she’s really easy to get going. I

thought about taking a peek, but I figured whoever it was would come out soon enough,” she said with a shrug of

her shoulders.

“So you just decided to hang around outside the dressing room to catch me?”

“Yeah, and to see if maybe I could get in on the action. It’s been a while since I’ve had a good roll in

the hay, and her moans are enough of an endorsement for me. What do you say, feeling up to it?”

Not quite believing my ears, I asked her “you want me fuck you too?”

“If you don’t want to, then I’ll just find someone else. I was just kind of hoping that you might be able

to make me scream like you did Michelle. Call it good timing, or even being in the right place at the right time

if you want.”

Checking my watch, I noticed that Michelle was going to take the stage in about ten minutes. “Give me some

time to recharge the battery. I’ll be in your dressing room in thirty minutes.”

“OK, you’ve got thirty minutes and not a second more. If you’re late, then I’ll find someone who’s willing

to be on time,” she said before turning and walking off.

Opening the door to Michelle’s dressing room, I went in to make sure she was getting ready. When she was

dressed, I interviewed her while she made her way to the stage. I stuck around to hear the first couple songs

before heading off to Avril’s dressing room for round two.

Knocking on Avril’s door, I checked my watch to make sure I had made it in time.

“You’re just in time,” Avril said as she opened the door. “I brought a surprise for you. I ran into Pink

and your friend on the way back, so I invited them to join us.”

“Which friend?” I asked as she moved out of the way to show Matt sitting on the couch with Pink between

his legs giving what looked to be one hell of a blow job.

As I entered the room, Matt nodded in my direction before closing his eyes and rolling his head back to

rest on the back of the couch.

“He sure seems to be enjoying himself,” I remarked.

“She’s got a skillful tongue and mouth,” Avril returned, giving me a knowing wink and smile. “I was going

to let Matt have first shot at me, but now that you’re here, I don’t have to wait.”

“What about Pink over there? She’s got no one to give her pleasure. What if she wants some too?”

“This is my dressing room. If I tell you to fuck me, you better damn well fuck me. Pink can get hers from

Matt if she wants it,” Avril snapped.

“That wink you gave me after saying how skillful her tongue was, made it sound like she’d used it on you

before. I think you should return the favor. It’s only fair, right guys?” I asked Matt and Pink.

Matt just raised his hand and gave me the thumbs up in agreement. Pink nodded her head and mumbled something

around Matt’s dick that made him groan.

“See, they both agree with me. Crawl under there and put that tongue of your’s to good use, and I’ll make

sure your pussy is put to good use as well. That way we all get some use at the same time,” I proposed to her.

Pulling her pants and underwear down, she said “OK, I’ll tongue her cunt. You better fuck me good, or I’ll

stop and let Matt finish me off.”

I stood there and watched Avril get on her back and slide between Pink’s knees before getting down to the

business of taking my own pants off. When I had them off, I looked down to see Avril with two fingers stuffed

into Pink’s cunt and swabbing Pink’s clit with her tongue. Admiring the sight, I dropped to my knees and ran

my hand through Avril’s bush and used my thumb to rub her clit. Lining my cock up with her opening, I pushed

the head in and began working the rest into her tight pussy. When I had the whole thing in, I put my weight on

my hands and started taking long, slow strokes.

After a few minutes of this, I heard Matt yell “I’m cumming.”

“My turn,” Pink said as she crawled up onto the couch and Matt completed the switch by taking his place

between her legs.

Stopping, I pulled out of Avril’s cunt. Rolling her over onto her hands and knees, I bent down and gave her

a few licks from clit to asshole and back. Standing up on my knees again, I plunged my cock into her waiting

snatch without warning.

Every inward thrust brought a moan from Avril as I reached the end of her channel and bumped against her


“Fuck me, oh yeah, fuck me,” Avril growled.

Grabbing her hips, I increased the speed of my thrusts. The room echoed with the sounds of my pelvis slapping

into Avril’s ass, mixed with the moans of the two ladies.

Off to the side, I heard Pink’s shrill scream as she came. Slowing down my thrusts, I looked over in time to

see Matt standing up to mount Pink.

“Give it to me baby. Come on and give to me. Don’t tease me,” Pink pleaded. Immediately, that was followed

by a guttural growl as Matt gave her every inch he had.

“Look at that,” I commanded Avril. “Does it turn you on to get fucked while your friend’s getting stuffed

right next to you?”

“Uhh… uh huh,” she said, nodding her head.

“Tell me how much it turns you on,” I said, emphasizing the command with a quick thrust of my hips.

“It makes me want to fuck you both and suck on her cunt at the same time,” she answered between moans.

“You hear that Matt? The slut wants to be triple teamed.”

“Sounds like fun, but I came here to fuck Pink and that’s what I’m going to do. If there’s anything left

after, then we can accommodate her. If not, then she’ll just have to come back to town,” Matt said over the noise.

Pulling out of Avril, I picked her up and bent her over the couch. “If you want to take both Matt and I, then

I better make sure you can take it in the ass. You don’t mind do you?” I asked, not really caring if she minded or


Shaking her head, she reached back to spread her ass cheeks for me.

“That’s a good girl,” I said, patting her ass. After slipping my finger into her pussy to wet it, I moved it

up to her anal pucker. I rimmed her asshole, and then applied gentle pressure. “Relax my dear. It won’t hurt if you

relax the muscles.” As the muscles started to relax, my finger tip slid into her anus up to the first knuckle.

“She’s really opening up for you,” Matt marveled.

“I bet she’s up for anything right now,” I said as I pushed more of my finger into her ass. When it was all the

way in, I twisted it in an effort to open her asshole up even more. Pulling my finger out, I replaced it with my

thumb. While my thumb was loosening up her rear entrance, I returned my cock to her pussy for more lubrication.

“Are you ready?” I asked as I pressed my cock head against her anus.

“Yeah. Go slow, OK?”

“Sure thing,” I answered before starting to push. At first, her asshole clamped shut. But as she focused on

relaxing, it started to yield. When the head popped past the sphincter, she gasped in surprise. “I’ll wait for you

to get used to it. Start pushing when you’re ready,” I told her as I reached forward and started to rub her clit

with my finger.

“Oh shit, I’m cumming,” I heard Matt yell as Avril started pushing back on my dick.

As my cock disappeared into Avril’s crapper, I looked over to see Pink getting dressed.

“Thanks babe,” she told Matt as she kissed him.

“You’re thanking me?” He asked, dumbfounded. “I get to fuck a great pussy like that, and get thanked for it?

I should be the one thanking you.”

“OK, you’re welcome too,” she said with a shrug as she put her shirt back on.

“Do I get my double now?” Avril asked as my cock finally went into her ass to the hilt.

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to get it back up so quickly,” Matt answered. Looking down at his already

inflating dick, he then said “I guess the thought of doubling you up has me more excited than I thought.”

Wrapping my arm around Avril’s waist, I rolled over on the couch.. With her now on top of me and my shaft

still imbedded in her ass, I spread her legs to make room for Matt.

“Her goes nothing,” Matt muttered as he stepped up between her legs. “You sure you can take this? You’re not

exactly big, and we’re not exactly small. We very well might break you in half.”

“You never know until you try,” she answered.

Just before Matt got going, I glanced over and noticed that Pink was dressed and sitting in a chair watching

the show.

“Enjoying the show over there?” I asked Pink.

“I will when Matt stops screwing around and fucks her,” she said.

“You heard her man. Pink wants you to give her everything you got, and then some,” I told Matt.

“Give the ladies what they ask for, that’s my motto,” he said as he positioned the head of his cock at Avril’s

entrance. Slowly pushing his way in, Avril bit her lip clamped her eyes shut. “Damn, this is tight. I don’t know if

I’ll be able to get all the way in.”

“She’ll tell us if she wants us to stop. If she doesn’t say anything, then don’t stop til you reach the back of

her teeth,” I told him.

Shaking his head, he continued to feed her cunt with his cock. I could feel his movements through the thin

membrane separating her holes.

“OH GAWD,” Avril screamed when he was finally all the way in. “I feel so full. It feels good, but I feel like

I’m on the verge of splitting in two.”

“That looks so hot,” Pink observed from her chair. “If I didn’t have to go perform in a few minutes, I’d be

getting in line to be the next one.”

Matt started to pull himself out, drawing whimpers from Avril. Then he slid back in, causing her to moan. We

both started to thrust, gaining a rhythm that sent the poor girl into a near constant state of climax. Finally, I

had all I could take and shot my load deep into her bowels. I held still while Matt continued to plow her now

loosened snatch, until I softened and fell out of her ass with a pop.

“Roll her over on top of you so I can get up,” I told Matt.

I got up and got dressed while watching Avril and Matt going at it like monkeys in the zoo on the couch.

“I never got to try you out, “Pink informed me in the hall after I left Avril’s dressing room. Slipping me her

number, she said “next time I’m in town, we definitely have to get together.”

“You know where to find me. Drop by the station for an interview or something,” I hollered after her as she

headed for the stage.

“Now I have to go see Michelle and find out if I’ve got anything left,” I muttered to myself. Whistling, I

headed back to her dressing room.

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