Anna Faris

I was walking back late to my hotel, feeling a little nervous. I was in town doing some research for the paper I worked for, and not wanting to pay the hotel’s rip off prices I had gone down to the 24 hour liquor store to pick up a couple of pint bottles of whisky. The down side to what had seemed like a good plan was that I had to walk through a shady part of LA to get back to my room. Shoulders hunched, I walked quickly, not looking up at the gangs of black kids gathered here and there, both hands stuffed in my pockets so as no one could be sure I wasn’t packing some shit. Normally, I would not expect any trouble due
to my height, powerful build, and black skin, but this was LA and it was a bit different to where I was from.

Feeling more nervous as I walked, I decided to take what I thought was a short cut through a dark alley, and soon got a bit lost. Just as I was thinking of retracing my steps, some tricked out shit started unplaying before my eyes. Some dude was chasing after a slim pretty looking girl, waving a knife at her! Shit, this was fucked up, I didn’t know whether to stay out of it or get involved, but I knew what I had to do really, and soon I had no choice anyway, the dude caught up with the girl and knocked her down, then he turned on me, obviously he had some shit planned that did not involve their being any witnesses. I eyes him nervously as he strode at me, knife outwards, I let my drink drop to the floor, too in shock I guess to even think about using a bottle as a weapon which I would have if I was smart. Instead I wrapped my car keys around my fist and held it low, squared my shoulders at him, and walked to meet him. I felt my feelings go cold, my emotions switch off, and the sense of violence and hate start to pulse and swell within my soul.

I eyed the kid; he was black, maybe 20 or 22, shaven headed and stocky. I think he expected me to be scared and try and run I sensed nervousness in him, but no way was he backing down. “This Bitch is mine brother” he spat at me hatefully, “I done chased her down half way through fucking town, so I can’t let you fuck with that, see?”

I didn’t even try and engage this fucking rapist, I just lunged at him with a slashing right hand aimed at his face, I caught him square on the bridge of the nose with the right, car keys wrapped around it, I felt bones breaking and crunching, I couldn’t tell if it was his nose, or my fingers, I swung the left but he was already bringing the knife upwards at me, damn the kid was fast! He stuck me. Shit! I staggered back, flailing with a right hand, but he hit me with a backhand slash across the face with the blade first, sending me down. I didn’t move, I wasn’t even sure I could. I didn’t know to what degree, but I was hurt bad. The black kid just left me for dead, and went back to the girl. On my side, I watched desperate and impotent as I watched him go back to her, pick her up by the hair and shove her against the wall. To my shock, I recognised the chick as Anna Faris, what the fuck was she doing in this part of town!

The black kid spat in her face. And slapped her hard. “Listen bitch, this is no fucking joke. If you do one thing wrong, you’re going to get killed, you understand, I’ll fucking stab you like I did my brother over there who thought he’d be a hero.” He pointed at me, I saw his nose was broken and bleeding badly, but this just seemed to have enraged him further. “First of all bitch, you will beg me to suck my dick, you will beg like a little fucking slut, like a fucking slave. You’re supposed to be a hot actress, this better be the performance of your life you honky white bitch!” he spat hate making his crazy face livid and twisted. Anna started to cry and he slapped at her again, “you get ONE chance at this whore! ONE CHANCE” he shouted “he held the knife tight to her throat, I saw Anna gathering herself, “puh-puh-lease let me suck you.” She whispered desperately in a broken voice.

The black dude hit her again. “That’s not good enough slave bitch, you have thirty seconds to perform well or you die!” I looked around me wondering if help was coming, I saw a lighted window and for second had hope, but then I realised the nerdy and overweight half caste kid, about 25 year old, who stood at the window wasn’t calling for help, he was masturbating over this sick, sick scene. I felt rage inside me expanding, and slowly started to pick myself up, I felt weak and hurt badly, but I might have one shot at the kid, but as soon as I tried to move I knew it was hopeless, I was too weak. Suddenly from nowhere, I heard the sound of a Raven screeching “Aeeerrghh! Aeeeerggghh!”

Suddenly, the entry music of ECW hardcore champion, and leader of The Flock, “Raven” sounded from nowhere. It sounded real, but no one else seemed to hear it, was I dying? No, I don’t think so. I felt strength surging through me! I have the soul of every wrestler in me; I was raised by that industry!

I rose to my feet, slowly, methodically. I spread my arms and stood cruciform in the middle of the street, my eyes blank, soulless, skyward. Anna saw me rise out of the corner of her eye I think, for she started begging like a slave to be allowed to suck this fucking evil rapists dick. Ever a brilliant actress, she told the creep what he wanted and he said grandly “very well bitch whore, you may suck my dick,” he pulled it out and Anna dipped her face towards it, the knife was still held close to her neck.

“What about me?” I said quietly in an even toned voice. The rapist turned to face me, shocked, and Anna took her cue and upper-cutted him hard in the balls as his attention and knife was for a second was turned away from her! He twisted to stick her, but she had rolled well out of range, and as he went to follow her, he remembered me, turned to face me, but too late…

I grabbed his knife arm and hooked it hard behind his back, my other arm gripping him in a tight headlock, he dropped the knife as I hoisted him 2 foot in the air by his fucking neck, and then drove his head first into the street! THE RAVEN EFFECT BABY!

His head smashed into the concrete hard, I felt his skull shatter, and as I spun out of the move, I saw his brains leaking out of his shattered cranium, beyond doubt he was dead!

Anna rushed towards me, looked horrified, “Oh my God, you’re bleeding everywhere!” She screamed, “You have to get to a hospital!” What a girl! Despite the ordeal she had been through, her concern was for me. I pulled away from her for a second, hoisted up the now dead rapist and dumped his corpse in a nearby dumpster for the garbage man to pick up. I turned to face the lighted window, and stared at the guy there as he ran from the window, and then I felt the soul of Raven leave me, and I gratefully fell against Anna and accepted her support as she helped me limp towards the way I had come, to get to a phone and call 911.

Sat up in the hospital bed a few hours later, I was again in wonder of Anna’s emotional and physical beauty. I was lucky, the knife wound in the stomach was just a flesh wound, it had missed all the vital organs, and the slash across my face was not so bad once it had been cleaned up. I would be left with a nasty little scar under my left eye, but no real damage. Anna had a couple of bruises, but was otherwise unhurt, physically at least. And perhaps the psychological trauma of this would be lessoned by the fact that she had retaliated, and it was her who had struck the first real blow against the rapist.

Anna volunteered to drive me back to the hotel, there was no use me hanging round the hospital, so I accepted. When I got back to the hotel, Anna offered me sex. I thought she was acting weird because of what she had been through, but she begged me: “Please, I feel so dirty after tonight, I want you to take it away, I want to be with you because I want to, to be normal again…” I didn’t know what to do, so I stripped down naked and lie down and let her kiss me. She did a little strip tease for me that soon got my dick rock, despite my reservations. Swaying her hips and pouting her lips, she slipped out of her tight hipsters and baggy sweater sexily, revealing her beautiful body to me. Se squeezed her breasts together and wiggled out of her panties, and by that point despite what I felt I was damn near chomping at the bit to get with her!

She was so beautiful it hurt my heart. She mounted me cowgirl style and kissed me softly on the side of my mouth one last time. The whole while I banged her felt kind of sick inside, I felt it was so wrong, Anna was so beautiful, so fit, but it didn’t matter, I just felt wrong. I pushed my impressive and intimidating erection up inside of her, grabbed and kneaded her tight ass as she rode me cowgirl style, and after I cum up inside her, I rolled her over and kissed her hair, stroked her face, held her close to me till she fell asleep, then I cried, and in her dreams I felt sure Anna ran and begged and was emotionally violated again and again as she lay there whimpering and fighting monsters in her sleep. Feeling strange and sad, I got up and dressed, leaving Anna to sleep.

I went back to the scene of the shit that went down this night, and not really knowing why, I broke into the nearby apartment building and went upstairs. I came to room 315, and for some reason tried my key in the door, and for some reason it opened. I walked in, and for some reason I felt like this was my apartment! Feeling completely wigged out, I walked over to the PC, unbelievable to me, on the screen was a pornographic story about some tall, bulky half caste kid, Anna Faris, she was attacked, he rescued her, then there was page after page of description of the sex they had afterwards…

Not wanting to see how the story ended, not wanting to know what was going on, just wanting to rip it all up, I span around, and to my shock, I saw myself, standing at the other side of the room, looking just as shocked as I felt!

“What the fuck is this?” I demanded, gesturing at the PC “what have you done to me?”

“It’s a story, you are a story” the other me murmured, as if he understood at least.

“Fuck this shit!” I cried, and swept the PC unto the floor

“That wont change anything…”, the other me said sadly.

Suddenly I understood what I needed to do. I rushed my other version, and grabbed him, took him down: but he was me, stronger than me because HE wasn’t stabbed this night! He fought out of it, and beat me down. I fought back hard and landed some good shots, but he was stronger. Finally he put me down with a hard right!

“Fuck you!” spat the other me. “Fuck you! What are you trying to do?! If you do this you will take away everything we have! A girl like Anna Faris! And not just tonight, every night! She is ours now, she is reliant on us!”

“You sick fuck” I spat at myself with a bleeding mouth.

“I don’t want to hurt her!” The other me cried back at me “we’ll look after her, we’ll never hurt her! We can protect her and love her and everything. If this is the price, this is worth it!”

I started to stand, the other me, squared up, mockingly asked “Don’t you get it, I AM you! You can’t beat me, I’m stronger than you!”

“What you did is wrong”, I said simply, unemotionally.

“And if it is, it is done, you cant take it back and you know it” the other me said.

I knew what to do; I saw a knife lying next to me on the table, a simple kitchen knife, but sharp enough. I made a play for it and got there way before the other me. He stood back, looking puzzled…

I held the knife to my own throat. “Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort!” I quoted, sneeringly at myself, enunciating every syllable individually. Then I slit my own throat and ended this bullshit! As I died, I saw the other me staring desperately at me “I never meant to! Please understand, I never meant to! I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” he pleaded as he faded away and then the whole world faded away…

Two weeks later I had to go back, my research work done and my article ready, but I was hanging round the set of “Scary Movie III” for like 4 hours because I wanted to be sure of something. Suddenly…

“Hey, Ms Faris! Please could you sign this for me? I asked as a weary looking Anna, tired by spending all day shooting no doubt, was hustled passed by a security guy. He gently but firmly eased me aside, but Anna stopped, I kind of knew she would.

“Sure” she said, and took the pen from me, I felt a tremor, even a slight moment of empathy for my dark side as her hand brushed mine as she took the pen from my hand. “Who shall I make it out to?”

“Erm… Adam…, and Ms Faris? I really love your work, you’re so talented” I told her.

She wrote out two or three of lines and handed me the paper with her signature back and gave me the sweetest smile. “Thank you! That’s so kind of you to say!” she beamed at me, and then gave a little wave as she went off to her limo.

I saw all I wanted. I got one last look at her pretty face which I would probably never see so close again, I saw her eyes, tired, but happy and clear like a summer’s sky; I saw not one part of recognition when she smiled sweetly at me and wrote her autograph. She had no idea who I was, no idea of what had almost happened to us.

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